i don't know anymore
i just don't have this lust to live any longer
it's something that i don't know anymore
everything is just crap, just fucking shit
i hate it
yesterday i was in a good mood but not anymore
i'm not supposed to do this anymore
everything is so dark
death feels like the thing for me right now
i don't wanna live like this
not with this feeling
"hold on"
i can't fucking hold on
i have waited for 3 years for some kind of death
i have been trying to kill myself
oh no! don't tell!
i don't know how to get out of this!

i just, i can't live like this anymore
sometimes, or pretty often i think of myself as sick, i mean real sick in my head.
mentalill  you know.
fuck it
i will never bee a normal person
i don't know how to control this fucking feeling
everyone is talking all the time of shit i don't care about
i don't believe in
"it's going to be all right"
no it's not
stop saying that and say something usefull instead
no one undarstands
no one gets it
no one
it's just so dark everywhere
i just can't live like this
don't say anything!
how can i control my life?
tell me
i don't know!
everyone is just talking a lots of CRAP!
you don't ever listens to yourself when you talk
you can't hear yourselfs
fuck it
somewhere within all this darkness of me, there is something good
i just have to find it.

fix it
fix me
break open my head then.